Me and a few friends went over to Batam over the weekend for a short weekend getaway. We discussed it during one of our poker nights 2 weeks ago, and groupon happened to have a promotion a few days later. Ah, synchronicity!
We all thought it was going to be a free and easy deal, which includes just the ferry and hotel, but turned out it included a half day itinerary of day tours. Bah. We were ferried from various landmarks to the other, which included factory outlets to go-kart to temples. By the time we reached the hotel at 5.30pm, we were all drained!
After dinner, we washed up, and began our alcohol fuelled poker night. As it turned out, we bought too many drinks, but had to finish them before we go to bed. After a few "motivational speeches" from me, we finally downed all the drinks. Yay. That's when it all started to go downhill for me.
The night seemed especially long, I remember waking up a few times. Daylight has broken when I suddenly woke up feeling queasy. I went to the toilet and started vomiting the contents that were consumed a few hours ago. Not a pretty sight, but I still had the decency to clean up the toilet bowl before going back to bed.
I puked another couple of times after that. By 10am, my body was a wreak. I could not eat or drink anything. I remember drinking water, and a minute later the same water will come back up, a bit murkier. It's like washing the intestines.
We had to check out at 12pm and head to the ferry terminal, but I was still in very bad shape. During the bus ride, I was breaking into cold sweat, thankfully I did not puke inside the bus. All said and done, I had to leave my friends and take an earlier ferry home.
I usually wouldn't relate to this, some people may find it crazy, but I think I was attacked by a foreign entity in the hotel room. The reason I felt that is because of a couple of things. Firstly when I accompanied my friend to the lobby to have breakfast, I felt queasy again. I went to the toilet bowl to see if anything's coming out. Nothing. After that I stood at the basin motionless to compose myself. Then the tap beside me, which is motion sensored, started to go off a few times, which spooked me a bit.
Later in the day, just before I was about to board the ferry, the puking sensation came again. Luckily I had a bag with me as this time was for real. I vomited before I could reach the toilet. Just beside the toilet was actually a prayer room, and there were a few muslims doing their afternoon prayers. I had to walk past the prayer room to get to the toilet. After that vomit, I actually felt very good, like the whole sickness had gone away. I boarded the ferry feeling normal and well.
But as we went further away from the terminal, the feeling came back. Perhaps it was sea-sickness, or perhaps the lost soul ran away and came back, I'm not sure.
All in all, i'm feeling much better now after seeing the doctor. He prescribed me some medicine for stomach flu. Maybe I should have told him I got beer overdose instead.
Monday, April 11, 2011
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Self Acceptance
I came across this teaching on the internet, and it struck a cord. Thought I should share it here. The story below the teaching connected to me the most, read on!
Heart's-ease in the king's garden
You cannot improve upon yourself. And I am not saying that improvement does not happen, remember--but you cannot improve upon yourself. When you stop improving upon yourself, life improves you. In that relaxation, in that acceptance, life starts caressing you, life starts flowing through you. Nobody else has ever been like you and nobody else will ever be like you; you are simply unique, incomparable.
Accept this, love this, celebrate this--and in that very celebration you will start seeing the uniqueness of the others, the incomparable beauty of the others.
Love is possible only when there is a deep acceptance of oneself, the other, the world. Acceptance creates the milieu in which love grows, the soil in which love blooms.
I have heard: A king went into his garden and found wilted and dying trees, shrubs and flowers. The oak said it was dying because it could not be tall like the pine. Turning to the pine, he found it drooping because it was unable to bear grapes like the vine. And the vine was dying because it could not blossom like the rose.
He found Heart's-ease blooming and as fresh as ever. Upon inquiry, he received this reply:
"I took it for granted that when you planted me you wanted Heart's-ease. If you had desired an oak, a vine or a rose, you would have planted them. So I thought that since you put me here, I should do the best I can to be what you want. I can be nothing but what I am, and I am trying to be that to the best of my ability."
You are here because this existence needs you as you are. Otherwise somebody else would have been here!--existence would not have helped you to be here, would not have created you. You are fulfilling something very essential, something very fundamental, as you are.
If God wanted a Buddha he could have produced as many Buddhas as he wanted. He produced only one Buddha--that was enough, and he was satisfied to his heart's desire, utterly satisfied. Since then he has not produced another Buddha or another Christ.
He has created you instead. Just think of the respect that the universe has given to you! You have been chosen, not Buddha, not Christ, not Krishna. You will be needed more, that's why. You fit more now. Their work is done, they contributed their fragrance to existence. Now you have to contribute your fragrance.
But the moralists, the puritans, the priests, they go on teaching you, they go on driving you crazy. They say to the rose, "Become a lotus." And they say to the lotus, "What are you doing here? You have to become something else." They drive the whole garden crazy, everything starts dying--because nobody can be anybody else, that is not possible.
That's what has happened to humanity. Everybody is pretending. Authenticity is lost, truth is lost, everybody is trying to show that he is somebody else. Just look at yourself: you are pretending to be somebody else. And you can be only yourself--there is no other way, there has never been, there is no possibility that you can be anybody else. You will remain yourself. You can enjoy it and bloom, or you can wither away if you condemn it.
Above taken from www.osho.com
Let us aspire to be noone else but ourselves. We are beautiful =)
Heart's-ease in the king's garden
You cannot improve upon yourself. And I am not saying that improvement does not happen, remember--but you cannot improve upon yourself. When you stop improving upon yourself, life improves you. In that relaxation, in that acceptance, life starts caressing you, life starts flowing through you. Nobody else has ever been like you and nobody else will ever be like you; you are simply unique, incomparable.
Accept this, love this, celebrate this--and in that very celebration you will start seeing the uniqueness of the others, the incomparable beauty of the others.
Love is possible only when there is a deep acceptance of oneself, the other, the world. Acceptance creates the milieu in which love grows, the soil in which love blooms.
I have heard: A king went into his garden and found wilted and dying trees, shrubs and flowers. The oak said it was dying because it could not be tall like the pine. Turning to the pine, he found it drooping because it was unable to bear grapes like the vine. And the vine was dying because it could not blossom like the rose.
He found Heart's-ease blooming and as fresh as ever. Upon inquiry, he received this reply:
"I took it for granted that when you planted me you wanted Heart's-ease. If you had desired an oak, a vine or a rose, you would have planted them. So I thought that since you put me here, I should do the best I can to be what you want. I can be nothing but what I am, and I am trying to be that to the best of my ability."
You are here because this existence needs you as you are. Otherwise somebody else would have been here!--existence would not have helped you to be here, would not have created you. You are fulfilling something very essential, something very fundamental, as you are.
If God wanted a Buddha he could have produced as many Buddhas as he wanted. He produced only one Buddha--that was enough, and he was satisfied to his heart's desire, utterly satisfied. Since then he has not produced another Buddha or another Christ.
He has created you instead. Just think of the respect that the universe has given to you! You have been chosen, not Buddha, not Christ, not Krishna. You will be needed more, that's why. You fit more now. Their work is done, they contributed their fragrance to existence. Now you have to contribute your fragrance.
But the moralists, the puritans, the priests, they go on teaching you, they go on driving you crazy. They say to the rose, "Become a lotus." And they say to the lotus, "What are you doing here? You have to become something else." They drive the whole garden crazy, everything starts dying--because nobody can be anybody else, that is not possible.
That's what has happened to humanity. Everybody is pretending. Authenticity is lost, truth is lost, everybody is trying to show that he is somebody else. Just look at yourself: you are pretending to be somebody else. And you can be only yourself--there is no other way, there has never been, there is no possibility that you can be anybody else. You will remain yourself. You can enjoy it and bloom, or you can wither away if you condemn it.
Above taken from www.osho.com
Let us aspire to be noone else but ourselves. We are beautiful =)
Friday, January 28, 2011
Your love never fades
This is dedicated to my dearest dad, who crossed the rainbow bridge before i knew him, but is still around to look after me constantly.
Through a series of occurances, the universe showed me the power of synchonicity and the wonderful ways in which it works.
Earlier in the week, I was out of office with colleagues to buy some hardware supplies when one of my female colleague messaged us out of the blue to say that her husband suddenly fainted while working. Of course she had a big shock, and as I know the husband as well, I became a little concerned over his well-being.
A few thoughts ran into my mind, morbid mostly. My thoughts strayed to my dad. I was reminded of the day he went away 21 years ago, when he abruptly fainted while working as well. He didn't last the night then.
Just then, a big moth flew by right infront of me. It lingered around and above me for awhile. Some people believe that a moth is the spirit of a loved one coming to visit you. I was told that when i was young, and whenever i see a moth, i feel comfortable in the presence of it, believing that someone is visiting me.
So throughout the day, thoughts of my dad and my colleague's husband dominated me. My colleague brought her husband to the doctor and thankfully he is well now, just needed rest from work overexertion.
In the evening, through another series of occurances, I had a lovely conversation with a good brother's dad for awhile. Throughout the conversation, we talked about many things and I could feel his love and energy. He has tremendous amounts of joy and fatherly love for his loved ones and people around him. Somewhere in between, I found myself missing my dad a lot, but talking to my friend's dad actually gave me the feeling as if I was talking to my dad.
After the conversation, I was overwhelmed by his energy. It was a good feeling which carried me forward for the next few days. I had not felt this kind of love for a long time. The universe has given me a gift and I am grateful and thankful for everything that has happened.
I may not be able to hold you in my arms, but i know you are never far away. I feel truly blessed. Your love never fades.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
I have neglected youuuuuuuu!
Hello blog, once again. I know I have neglected you for quite awhile now. Just before Vox decided to shut down last September, I managed to move you temporarily to Typepad. You have been collecting dust there for a few months, but I have found you a new home!
I know you have not moved here in entirety, pictures from many posts are missing. I was contemplating whether to start a fresh blog or to export/import you from Typepad to Blogger using the steps given to me by Kester. In the end I decided to bring you along, as you have and always will be a part of me. Thank you for being a part of me all these while. I will treasure all the wonderful memories that you have been a part of.
Let this new home nurture a new beginning. Allow me to express my truths, aspirations and emotions freely, and to nurture the wisdom inside me as I walk along this indigo journey. Let the light in me shine brighter and stronger in 2011!
Huat ah, Happy new year one and all!
ps: Happy Birthday Bro Yan! hug hug =)
Monday, July 26, 2010
3 things that made me smile today
1. While having a meeting with my GM in his office, he told me he recognizes the effort I have been putting into my work. Even though he can't give me a promotion as I have not been with the company long enough, he's giving me an increment from next month, and will consider a promotion in due time. Thank you for the abundance. =)
2. I was in the office working til 7pm just now. After a tiring day of work, I was hoping the bus will come quickly. So I sent my prayers to the bus angel. Less than a minute after I reached the bus stop, not one, but two buses which I can take came. Of course I took the one that took me home on the shorter and faster road. Thank you bus angel. =) =)
3. I did 80 push-ups after I came back from work (4 sets of 20, with 1min break inbetween). 3 weeks ago, I was struggling to do 20. Haha. =) =) =)
Friday, July 23, 2010
3 things that made me smile today
1. My mum woke up especially early today to make red eggs for me to bring to office to eat. Thank you mum, they are lovely. I can feel your love with every bite. =)
2. A few close colleagues made a special card for me, and they also gave me an ang pow! Thank you very much for the wonderful gesture and abundance. In addition, my office has the tradition of celebrating monthly birthdays. I am the only one whom birthday falls in July, so my HR colleague purposely went to buy 2 cakes today for the whole office to celebrate for me *blush*. Thank you thank you. Bless you all, and best wishes to everyone too. =) =)
3. I met mum and sis in town for dinner in the evening. The last time we had a meal together was during my sis's birthday last month. It was a nice session with good food and lots of love for each other. Dear universe, please tell my mum this. I love you, thank you for bringing me into the world. I am all grown up now, don't worry so much for me. Focus on yourself, let go of your worries and live each day to the fullest happiness and joy. I will be with you always. =) =) =)
Thursday, July 22, 2010
3 things that made me smile today
1. I passed my IPPT! Today was my 3rd time taking, after 2 failed attempts during reservist 2 weeks ago, plus today is the last chance for me to take before my window closes. Yay, no need to go for remedial training and got $100 reward.
Close shave with the running though, 11 more seconds and I would have failed. =)
2. Met up with a friend I havn't seen for 2 years at Suntec after the IPPT. Nice to catch up with old friends once in awhile, and glad to know that he's doing well in all aspects of his life. Hopefully it won't be another 2 years before we meet up again. =) =)
3. When I came home, mum was there to congratulate me for passing my IPPT. Went to shower immediately and after I came out, I saw this on my bed.
Mum had placed it on my pillow. When I came back, she was spying and hoping that I would see it, but I didn't! She was a bit disappointed. When I saw it after coming out of the showers, it was a pleasant surprise and I couldn't help but smile. I love you mum. Hug hug kiss kiss. =) =) =)
Are there 3 things that made you smile today?
Monday, December 7, 2009
51121
It was one of my goals for 2009, and I did it! *clap clap* Haha.
51121, that's the number of steps I took to complete my second marthon yesterday. It took me about 6 hours to finish the whole thing, which was one quarter of a day! Age must be catching up on me, my timing 3 years ago was much better.
I had wanted to take pictures along the route and post them up, but my phone's camera wasn't cooperating. =(
The marathon started off good, until around the 16km mark. That was when the cramps started to come. I have never experienced such intense cramps before. I had underestimated the distance, and did not condition myself properly for the event. I was literally limping my way through two-thirds of the distance.
The worst part of the marathon has to be the East Coast Stretch, from the Fort Road entrance all the way to the last carpark, and back to Fort Road again. Coming back from Carpark H, the thought of whether this stretch was ever going to end kept popping into my head. Haha.
But I keep telling myself that the people infront and behind me are fighting their own battles too. How can I give up if they are persisting through the same ordeal too. I had to carry on! Alas, we could smell the finish line when we entered the floating platform. It was just a few hundred metres infront of us. Our paces quicken.
It was a sweeeeeeeet sense of satisfaction when I finally crossed the finish line. Now, writing this, the after effects are kicking in. No, not euphoria, but pain. Lots and lots of pain. Haha. But this pain is rather addictive. I am sure a few years down the road, I will think about the pain again, and stupidly sign up for another one. Til the next time. =)
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
A photo a day
I was eating snake with my colleagues at the bowling alley just now. Got a tube of the yan yan snack. The sticks are printed with all sorts of corny words now, some with very funny spelling errors. Haha.
Saturday, October 24, 2009
Happy birthday
After spending the whole day setting up for tomorrow's run, I went to meet some friends to celebrate a birthday. The birthday cake is a platter of hooters chicken wings. Haha. Happy birthday! I have to be back at work at 4am tomorrow :(
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